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Every December, millions of families sit down to watch “A Christmas Story,” the 1983 classic that has become as much a holiday staple as eggnog and mistletoe. We all remember Ralphie Parker’s (as played by Peter Billingsley<\/a>) singular, obsessive quest for a Red Ryder Carbine Action 200-shot Range Model air rifle.<\/p>\n The film famously journeys through Ralphie’s vivid daydreams, where the BB gun transforms him into a hero. In one of the most memorable vignettes, Ralphie imagines writing a school essay in which he lists reasons why the Red Ryder would be an ideal Christmas gift. In Ralphie’s fantasy, the essay is so profound that it moves his teacher, Miss Shields, to tears. Miss Shields\u2014the quintessentially strict, 1940s schoolmarm\u2014is so impressed she grants him a legendary “A-plus-plus-plus-plus-plus<\/strong>” before leading the class in a thunderous chant of “Ralphie! Ralphie!<\/strong>“<\/p>\n Of course, reality is much harsher. In the real world of the film, Miss Shields hands back a disappointing C-plus with the devastating marginalia: “You’ll shoot your eye out.<\/strong>“<\/p>\n