<\/p>\n
Last week, <\/span>Prince Harry<\/b> was back in England, taking the stand in one of his many ongoing lawsuits against the British tabloid press. Despite my unnecessary amount of knowledge of both the U.K.\u2019s royal family and its aggressive media ecosystem, I cannot seem to remember what the very litigious Harry and <\/span>Meghan Markle<\/b> are suing over at any given time, but I do know that Harry was near tears (<\/span>according to Page Six<\/span><\/a>) while recounting how Associated Newspapers made his wife\u2019s life miserable when they lived in England.<\/span><\/p>\n But by Sunday, he was back stateside and promoting his and Meghan\u2019s latest documentary film that I\u2019m sure no one will watch. That has nothing to do with the sweet topic (Girl Scouts selling cookies!) but more to do with their history of creating content that no one really wants. <\/span><\/p>\n There were <\/span>reportedly dozens<\/span><\/a> of empty seats at the Sundance premiere, despite the draw of seeing celebrities (if you count the Duke and Duchess of Sussex as celebrities). Meghan gave a speech beforehand, thanking people for attending despite having potentially stayed out late, which honestly made me lol. If no one wants to see your film at a <\/span>film festival<\/span><\/i>, that seems like a problem even the most sober, early nights couldn\u2019t solve. Plus, over the weekend, multiple outlets <\/span>reported<\/span><\/a> that the second season of Meghan\u2019s inane lifestyle show, <\/span>With Love, Meghan <\/span><\/i>(<\/span>watching it felt like getting a very soothing lobotomy),<\/a> didn\u2019t crack Netflix\u2019s top 1,000, nor did her Christmas special. <\/span><\/p>\n And while<\/span>\u00a0her latest podcast venture, Confessions of a Female Founder, debuted favorably on the Spotify and Apple charts last spring, it dropped below the top 100 on Spotify and the top 200 on Apple within a month. (To be fair, like 98% of what does chart seems fucking awful\u2014but I\u2019m not sure if that\u2019s better or worse for her here.)<\/p>\n The only business venture that <\/span>does<\/span><\/i> seem to be working for the couple right now is Meghan\u2019s twee foodstuffs line. A <\/span>glitch<\/span><\/a> earlier this month revealed that her website has hundreds of thousands of units of jam, flower sprinkles, etc., in stock and while some snarky sources speculated that it means that no one wants her overpriced candles and biscuit mixes, her <\/span>weird products<\/span><\/a> have <\/span>already sold out<\/span><\/a> multiple times, so this honestly just seems like a good read of her potential customer base.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n But all that leaves poor Prince Harry adrift in America. Multiple sources <\/span>told Page Six<\/span><\/a> that the thing he\u2019s good at is philanthropy, and he really should get back to doing it, but even his and Meghan\u2019s charity, Archewell, has recently downsized. Most of his friends in California are reportedly friends of Meghan\u2019s, and he remains estranged from his brother, Prince William<\/strong>, and father, <\/span>King Charles<\/b>, who announced he had cancer in February 2024. Harry\u2019s sister-in-law, <\/span>Kate Middleton<\/b>, was also diagnosed with cancer around that time, and if health scares weren\u2019t enough to bring the family back together, I don\u2019t know what will be. (However, I want them to patch things up, because I don\u2019t like feeling bad for literal royalty.)<\/span><\/p>\n While I can\u2019t put my finger on it, something is afoot with Meghan and Harry; they\u2019ve also lost six different<\/a> public relations staffers in the past two years. Whether that\u2019s because there\u2019s some bigger, unflattering story developing beneath the surface, or because making them seem publicly interesting is a nearly impossible job, only time will tell. Meanwhile, I will be eagerly watching to see what happens with the Sussexes\u2019 (failing?) media empire, even if no one is still eagerly watching what they produce.<\/span><\/p>\n\n