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Beep beep, alert! This is not a drill, people.<\/p>\n
After almost a year<\/a> of info trickling in, drips and drops at a time, Bravo just dropped a full 5-minute trailer for \u201cThe Real Housewives of Rhode Island.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n The first-ever Housewives series set in New England premieres April 2 at 9 p.m.<\/p>\n PS: If you missed them at the Boston St. Patty\u2019s Day parade, you can catch them at Fenway April 17.<\/p>\n In the trailer, we learn more about two Housewives:<\/p>\n Alicia Carmody<\/strong> \u2014 a Providence resident who runs, with her fianc\u00e9 Billy Kitsilis, Pizza Mamma in Cranston<\/strong><\/a>, and other restaurants \u2014 and Liz McGraw: the state\u2019s \u201cCannabis Queen,\u201d per Bravo. With her husband, Gerry, she owns and operates The Slater Center<\/strong><\/a>, a pot dispensary in Providence.<\/p>\n Grab your popcorn \u2026.<\/p>\n We open in Providence, at Alicia\u2019s House, and she\u2019s \u201cstressed.\u201d Her husband asks if she wants red wine. \u201cAny colah,\u201d (color) she says in a perfect Rhody dropped-r r accent. \u201cMy family, when they come ovah, I just need the edge awff (off) \u2014 you know what I mean?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n This is when non-New Englanders who only know Bawston accents\u00a0from Ben Affleck movies learn that many Rhode Islandahs (especially Providence, Cranston and Warwick peeps) have the same accent<\/em>.<\/p>\n Alicia, Billy and their daughter Celina, 9, are getting ready for a visit from Alicia\u2019s \u201cbig Italian family\u201d \u2014 her six aunts all live in Rhody. Celina randomly starts singing \u201cDeck the Halls\u201d as they set the table.\u00a0<\/p>\n Alicia laughs, realizing: \u201cBecause Christmas is the last time I set the table! \u2026Don\u2019t make me die.\u201d<\/p>\n Celina is her \u201cmini-me.\u201d They both love Britney Spears (Spea-ahs), we learn.\u00a0<\/p>\n Alicia\u2019s long-time fianc\u00e9, Billy, owns \u201ca bunch of restaurants in Rhode Island. My favorite is Pizza Mamma.<\/a>\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n\n Now, this next part is very real,\u00a0and where, as a lifelong born-and-bred Rhode Islander,\u00a0I get to share the culture of my people. The old clich\u00e9 (and meme) is that we Rhode Islanders HATE (I need CAPS LOCK here) driving more than 10 minutes? Truth. <\/em><\/p>\n Even the hit-or-miss Google AI overview<\/a> is onto us. (\u201cRhode Islanders have a well-documented, almost comical, aversion to driving long distances, often considering 10 miles or a drive to a neighboring town a significant \u201cday trip\u201d requiring preparation.\u201d)<\/p>\n Cut to a car full of Alicia\u2019s family driving from <\/em>Cranston to Providence. Cranston is 15 minutes from Providence.<\/p>\n Anita, Alicia\u2019s Mom, tells us, \u201cAlicia wants to move back to Cranston some day, really bad, \u2018cause she misses being with family.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s just so fah!\u201d Sharon, Alicia\u2019s aunt, adds. \u201cYou gotta pack a lunch just to go there.\u201d<\/p>\n Alicia explains: When she was pregnant, and they moved 15 minutes to Providence, \u201cthat was terrible.\u201d<\/p>\n They arrived at the house.\u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cBilly!\u201d her mom exclaims.\u00a0 \u201cI love this house, don\u2019t get me wrong. But I say we can build a beautiful one in Cranston.<\/p>\n An aunt adds, \u201cBilly! What a wedding you could have out here.\u201d<\/p>\n Cue the awkward faces from Billy and Alicia, as her family begs them to marry soon.<\/p>\n Alicia explains they got engaged when she was seven months pregnant with their now 9-year-old.\u00a0<\/p>\n Side note: We learn that Alicia\u2019s grandfather opened Superior Bakery<\/a> and a few other pizza restaurants, and \u201cwas well known all over in Rhode Island.\u201d<\/p>\n They sit to eat. \u201cAlicia, have you seen Liz?\u201d a relative asks, referring to castmate Liz.\u00a0<\/p>\n Alicia explains she\u2019s \u201cknown Liz since I was born \u2026. Sometimes Liz makes me nervous. She\u2019s definitely a queen. Queen Elizabeth. She lives in the most gorgeous castle.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n Cut to a stunning mansion on the water in Cranston, it appears to be Pawtucket Village, with Liz drinking out of a silver goblet. She tells the camera: \u201cEveryone always says I\u2019m blunt and I bite people\u2019s heads off. And \u2014 I get this a lot lately \u2014 I can be [uses air quotes] scary.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n We then see Liz walking her cat Ganji on a leash down to \u201csee dad.\u201d<\/p>\n Dad, her husband Gerry, is cleaning Ganji poop off a white carpet.\u00a0<\/p>\n Liz explains she met Gerry at a bar. They were married six months when \u201cthe whole ancestry DNA thing was blowing up \u2026 we are related somewhere down the line.\u201d<\/p>\n [Ahem, mic drop.]<\/p>\n She tells us she has three step-daughters, Gerry\u2019s kids, and \u201cwas not prepared to be a mom,\u201d she says, recalling a story about driving them to school. The girls screamed, \u201cStop!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSkylar\u2019s not in the car yet. Skylar\u2019s got one foot in the car,\u201d Liz recalls with a laugh.\u00a0<\/p>\n Welp, I need more of all of this ASAP. RHORI premieres April 2 on Bravo.\u00a0<\/p>\n After the premiere on April 2, the show will move to its regular time-slot Sundays at 9 p.m. on April 5. Episodes stream the next day on Peacock.<\/p>\n RHORI looks into \u201cthe world of a tight-knit circle of Rhode Islanders who have deep community roots and families that go back generations,\u201d per Bravo. Rhody\u2019s real housewives will navigate \u201cthe murky waters of friendships, feuds, and shifting loyalties within Rhode Island\u2019s tightly woven social scene.\u201d<\/p>\n Learn more about all the Housewives cast members and the show here<\/a>.<\/p>\n Watch the new trailer here<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n