<\/p>\n
What\u2019s that they say about history repeating itself? The War of the Roses <\/i>was also known as the Cousins War, when rival wings of the Plantagenets clobbered each other round the head with broadswords and yelled \u2018knave!\u2019 at one another across boggy, corpse-logged fields. <\/p>\n
600 years on, the royal cousins are back at it.<\/p>\n
The countdown is on to the next royal wedding and on the happy day, there will be ignoring the fact that Queen Elizabeth<\/a>\u2019s grandchildren have splintered into two factions, the In\u2019s and the Out\u2019s, thanks to some last minute cancellations and key names left entirely off the guest list. <\/p>\n Come June 6 at All Saints Church in Kemble, Cirencester, when public health service nurse Harriet Sperling will wed King Charles<\/a>\u2019 nephew Peter Phillips<\/a> and Princess Anne<\/a> will get to show off her Nutbush<\/i> moves, it won\u2019t be one big happy royal family on show. It will be an Ozempic-ed one, with only some beaming younger royals on hand to merrily show off best modern British dentistry has to offer and with a number of very awkward gaps in the line up. Imagine what that\u2019s doing to poor Harriet\u2019s seating chart. <\/p>\n Until this weekend all appeared to be locked in for Peter and Harriet\u2019s big day, the RSVPs in, the S Club 7 tribute band booked \u2013 when Thames Valley Police made two major announcements concerning Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor. <\/p>\n First came the news that they are widening their investigation into the former Duke of York and are now assessing claims of sexual misconduct. (Andrew was arrested on his 66th birthday in February for misconduct in public office; he has previously denied all wrongdoing.)<\/p>\n Then the following day it emerged that their detectives are examining an allegation Andrew behaved inappropriately towards a woman at Royal Ascot in 2002, as part of this broadened inquiry. <\/p>\n Which is why, don\u2019t expect to see Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie outside the church, chucking rice at the bride. The princesses are \u201cmortified\u201d by these latest revelations about Daddy Dearest, according to The Daily Beast <\/i>and The Royalist<\/i>\u2019s Tom Sykes<\/a>, and have decided to not go to the wedding. <\/p>\n The princesses, a source told Sykes, would \u201cnever want to overshadow the bride and groom\u2019s happy day.\u201d<\/p>\n They won\u2019t be the only no-shows. <\/p>\n It\u2019s probably very cold comfort for the Yorks to know they won\u2019t be the only royal cousins missing the chance to see what sort of damage Queen Camilla can do to an open bar. What of Prince Harry and Meghan, The Duke and Duchess of Sussex\u2019s? <\/p>\n They were, as the Brits say, NFI. Not flipping invited. <\/p>\n Harry won\u2019t be there on June 6 because, as a close friend of the groom told the Daily Mail<\/a><\/i>, \u201cPeter and Harry haven\u2019t spoken for several years and have simply lost touch.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cPeter and Harriet\u2019s wedding is an intimate occasion with their close friends and immediate family around them in the Cotswolds.\u201d<\/p>\n Also dealing a cousinly blow to Harry this week is Mike Tindall, who is married to Anne\u2019s daughter Zara, who seemingly mocked the duke over the weekend while appearing at an arts and literature festival in Wales. During a panel he said that he had known \u201cHarry, when he was fun.\u201d<\/p>\n