{"id":2468306,"date":"2026-06-20T13:38:56","date_gmt":"2026-06-20T13:38:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/celebrity.land\/en\/?p=2468306"},"modified":"2026-06-20T13:38:56","modified_gmt":"2026-06-20T13:38:56","slug":"lgbtq-reality-stars-share-advice-for-younger-selves","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/celebrity.land\/en\/lgbtq-reality-stars-share-advice-for-younger-selves\/","title":{"rendered":"LGBTQ+ Reality Stars Share Advice for Younger Selves"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/p>\n

\n

This Pride Month, the bravest thing you can be is yourself.<\/p>\n

For reality stars, sharing the good, bad and downright unpredictable moments of their lives look easy. But for those who identify as members of the LGBTQ+ community, life is a journey full of lessons learned along the way.<\/p>\n

In celebration of Pride, Us Weekly<\/i> asked members of the community \u2014 who appear on some of our favorite reality shows like The Valley<\/i><\/span><\/a>, Below Deck<\/i><\/span><\/a>, The Bachelor<\/i><\/span><\/a> and more \u2014 to write personal letters to their younger selves about what they wish they knew about love, confidence and life in general.<\/p>\n

What came next were messages of encouragement and hope that anyone can learn from. Keep reading to see what your favorite stars shared with all of Us:<\/p>\n

\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/figure>\n

\t\t<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

\n\t\t\t
\n Related: <\/span>‘Bachelor’ Alums Who Came Out As Members of the LGBT+ Community\u00a0<\/span><\/a>
\n\t\t<\/h3>\n<\/p><\/div>\n

\n\t\t\tGabby Windey, Colton Underwood and more Bachelor Nation alums are living their most authentic lives\u00a0after appearing on the franchise. Windey, for her part, revealed in August 2023 that she is dating a woman for the first time. The season 19 Bachelorette, who split from ex-fianc\u00e9 Erich Schwer in 2022 after a televised proposal, sparked a [\u2026]\t\t<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

The Bachelor\u2019s Colton Underwood<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Colton Underwood<\/span> Courtesy of Colton Underwood\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
The thing you\u2019re spending so much energy hiding is the same thing that will one day make your life make sense. I know right now it feels safer to be who everyone expects, but the people worth keeping are the ones who show up after you stop performing. You\u2019re going to build a family, do work that means something and wake up next to someone who knows the real you and stays. Be patient with yourself in the meantime. The fear lifts, and what\u2019s underneath it is a life you couldn\u2019t have imagined from where you\u2019re standing.
With love, Colton<\/p>\n

The Valley: Persian Style\u2019s Reza Farahan<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Reza Farahan<\/span> Courtesy of Reza Farahan\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
You may not believe this right now, but when you come out, your friends and family will embrace you. You\u2019re going to meet the love of your life and you\u2019ll get married; your friends and family will celebrate that love with you. It sounds clich\u00e9, but it does get better. The difficult times will only make you stranger and smarter.
You got this. The life you\u2019ve always wanted is waiting for you to grow into it.<\/p>\n

The Valley\u2019s Jasmine Goode<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Jasmine Goode<\/span> Courtesy of Jasmine Goode\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear young Jasmine,
Don\u2019t be afraid to love who you love. That love is real, it is valid and it is absolutely worth it.
The world you\u2019re stepping into has so much room for you, exactly as you are. Walk into it with your head high.
Younger me, be proud. Not just because it\u2019s Pride Month, but because you survived every moment that tried to make you feel like you weren\u2019t enough.<\/p>\n

Southern Hospitality\u2019s TJ Dinch<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n TJ Dinch<\/span> Courtesy of TJ Dinch\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
I know you\u2019re worried about being accepted and wondering where you fit in, but one day you\u2019ll realize that being true to yourself is your greatest strength. The path won\u2019t look anything like you expect, but it will be better. You\u2019ll have the courage to chase big dreams, create something of your own and inspire people simply by being yourself.
Stop worrying about what other people think and start believing in yourself sooner. You\u2019ll be just fine.<\/p>\n

The Valley\u2019s Zack Wickham\u00a0<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Zack Wickham<\/span> Courtesy of Zack Wickham\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self, through all the questions, uncertainty and loneliness, you will find your chosen family and yourself. Never stop fighting for your rights and the rights of others because while it does get better, the fight for equality is never truly over.<\/p>\n

The Bachelor\u2019s Becca Tilley<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Becca Tilley<\/span> Courtesy of Becca Tilley\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
I know that you\u2019re scared and worried about what people will think about you, but I want you to know that as soon as you let those fears go, your life is going to get so much more beautiful than you thought possible.<\/p>\n

Below Deck Mediterranean\u2019s Captain Sandy Yawn<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Captain Sandy Yawn<\/span> Charles Sykes\/Bravo<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear younger Sandy,
I know you\u2019re scared.
I know there are nights when you lie awake wondering if you\u2019ll ever truly belong. You spend so much energy trying to be who everyone else expects you to be that you\u2019ve forgotten how beautiful it feels to simply be yourself.
You think your differences are something to hide.
They\u2019re not. You have found joy, other ways to escape. The merry go round of drugs and alcohol.
One day, you\u2019ll discover that the very things you\u2019re afraid of today will become your greatest strengths and you will see the light and be in recovery to a life beyond your dreams.
You\u2019ll learn that courage isn\u2019t the absence of fear \u2014 it\u2019s moving forward despite it.
You\u2019ll face rejection. You\u2019ll face judgment. There will be people who don\u2019t understand your journey, your heart or who you love. But hear me when I tell you this: Their opinions will never define your worth.
You are not broken.
You are not too much.
You are not less than.
You are exactly who God created you to be.
One day, you\u2019ll stand on the bridge of some of the most incredible yachts in the world. You\u2019ll become a leader in an industry where few women have gone before. You\u2019ll break barriers, shatter glass ceilings and prove that authenticity is a superpower.
Most importantly, you\u2019ll find love.
The kind of love that feels like coming home.
The kind of love that reminds you that you never had to change to be worthy of being loved.
There will be moments when life feels impossibly hard. There will be losses, heartbreaks and challenges you never imagined. But there will also be joy beyond your wildest dreams.
Keep going.
Trust yourself.
Trust the journey.
And never apologize for who you are.
Your story will become a light for others who are still searching for their own courage.
One day, you\u2019ll realize that the thing you feared most \u2014 being seen \u2014 became the very thing that set you free.
Walk boldly.
Love deeply.
Lead with kindness.
And remember, the world doesn\u2019t need another version of someone else.
It needs you.
With love and gratitude,
Captain Sandy Yawn<\/p>\n

Jay & Pamela\u2019s Jay Thomas Manuel<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Jay Thomas Manuel<\/span> Courtesy of Jay Thomas Manuel\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear younger Jay,
I know there are times when you feel different and wonder where you belong, but never forget that you are enough exactly as you are. The qualities that make you stand out today will become your greatest strengths tomorrow. One day, you\u2019ll find love, build a beautiful life and accomplish things beyond what you can imagine.
Trust the process, stay true to yourself and don\u2019t let anyone else\u2019s opinions define your worth.<\/p>\n

Southern Hospitality\u2019s Michols Pe\u00f1a<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Michols Pena<\/span> Courtesy of Michols Pena\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
Things may feel weird knowing you\u2019re different but not understanding why. From making friends to being vocal at home and in relationships that you\u2019re not sure how to navigate, always remind yourself that you will find your voice, peace and happiness soon.
You\u2019ll be 18 years old before you know it and be able to explore everything life has to offer and truly come into your own, and when you do, all of the pain, tears, struggles and hardships will all be worth it. Be patient with yourself and never lose yourself because who you become will take you so far.<\/p>\n

Big Brother\u2019s Tommy Bracco<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Tommy Bracco<\/span> Courtesy of Tommy Bracco\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear Thomas,
I see you lie in bed and cry at night because you\u2019re so desperately trying to suppress who you are. It feels like the world will end if you accept that you\u2019re gay. It will not.
In fact, it\u2019s even better than you imagine on the other side. Your family and friends will accept you, but most importantly, you will accept yourself. So wipe those tears, be brave and breathe through this challenging chapter of life. For it\u2019s in the challenges we face that make us even stronger.<\/p>\n

Southern Hospitality\u2019s Lake Rucker<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Lake Rucker<\/span> Courtesy of Lake Rucker\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
Recognizing that you are worthy of love in all forms is the greatest accomplishment that you will achieve. Your queerness is not something you have to overcome; it\u2019s part of what makes you beautiful. I know you feel like you are TOO different or TOO indecisive, but one day you will be celebrated for your differences.
You will grow to be more and more proud of everything you do because the dreams you\u2019ve always dreamed about are coming true. Most importantly, remember that you are loved and appreciated.<\/p>\n

Big Brother\u2019s Christie Murphy<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Christie Murphy<\/span> Courtesy of Christie Murphy\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
You have a boyfriend?! Girl, be serious. You know why it feels \u201coff.\u201d Stop trying to force the puzzle piece!
You may date a few more frogs before the universe finally smacks you over the head with the answer, and when it does, don\u2019t overthink it, don\u2019t explain it and definitely don\u2019t let other people\u2019s opinions get louder than your own intuition. Trust the butterflies, trust your gut and stop keeping track of who approves. Do you really even care anyway? LOL, no. Because one day you\u2019ll marry a hot woman, have babies, your dream house and the kind of love people wish they had. So relax, block out the noise and do what you\u2019ve always done best \u2014 be unapologetically yourself!<\/p>\n

The Circle\u2019s Sammie Cimarelli<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Sammie Cimarelli<\/span> Courtesy of Sammie Cimarelli\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my younger self,
The things that make you feel anxious today will one day become the things you\u2019re most proud of. You don\u2019t need to shrink yourself, change yourself or earn acceptance from people who aren\u2019t willing to see your worth. Love will find you, but always remember you are the love already. The love you will receive is additional.
Soon you\u2019ll stop believing you have to be anyone other than who you are, and the people meant for your life will celebrate you exactly as you come. Keep trusting yourself \u2014 there is so much joy, freedom and love waiting for you.<\/p>\n

Survivor\u2019s Carolyn Wiger<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Carolyn Wiger<\/span> Courtesy of Carolyn Wiger\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear younger me,
You\u2019re never going to be normal, and thank God for that. The things people call \u201ctoo much\u201d will eventually become the things you love most about yourself. You\u2019re going to make some questionable decisions, fall in love with who you want, fit in almost nowhere and somehow survive it all.
One day you\u2019ll discover that being a frickin\u2019 weirdo is way more fun than pretending to be normal.<\/p>\n

Survivor\u2019s Yamil \u2018Yam Yam\u2019 Arocho<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Yamil \u201cYam Yam\u201d Arocho<\/span> Courtesy of Yam Yam\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

To my little Yam Yam:
I know you think it\u2019s OK to stay inside watching TV and not put yourself out there because you think you\u2019re not pretty enough and don\u2019t deserve to be as happy as everybody else. But one day, being exactly who you ARE is going to be exactly what makes you PERFECT \u2026 your body, your personality, your accent, your humor, your gayness, all of it.
You will find love, happiness and a life beyond what you can imagine. And you will love putting yourself out there and sharing who you are with the world. We all have this superpower inside of us; you just have to believe it exists. You will OUTWIT, OUTPLAY, OUTLAST all your greatest challenges and fears.
All of your biggest dreams will come true when it finally CLICKS and you realize that YOU ARE PERFECT JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.<\/p>\n

90 Day Fiance\u2019s Kenny Niedermeier<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Kenny Niedermeier and Armando Niedermeier-Rubio<\/span> Courtesy of Kenny Niedermeier\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear Kenny,
I would tell my younger self that coming out during the 1980s will be harder than you can imagine. You will lose many friends to a heartbreaking epidemic, and there will be moments when fear and grief feel overwhelming. But hold on to hope, because the love and strength of our community will carry you through, and one day you\u2019ll see a world with more acceptance than you ever thought possible. Those experiences won\u2019t break you. They will make you more compassionate, more resilient and deeply grateful for the family you build along the way.
You will live your life for all your friends you lost, full of honor and PRIDE.<\/p>\n

90 Day Fiance\u2019s Armando Niedermeier-Rubio<\/b><\/h2>\n

Dear younger me,
Growing up in a small town with a small-town mentality, you\u2019re going to feel scared to be yourself and afraid of being judged. You\u2019ll be terrified to accept those unknown feelings in your heart, and for a long time, you\u2019ll try to hide them because you believe that\u2019s what you\u2019re supposed to do.
There will be experiences that break your heart, but they will also help shape the strong, compassionate person you become.
One day, you will find the courage to fully be yourself, and you\u2019ll discover a level of self-love and acceptance you never thought possible. You\u2019ll also receive the support of your family in ways you couldn\u2019t imagine, find the man of your dreams and build a beautiful life and family together. You\u2019ll realize that the parts of yourself you once tried to hide are the very things that lead you to the happiest life you could have imagined.<\/p>\n

Dear or No Deal Island\u2019s Phillip Solomon\u00a0<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n
\"LGBTQ<\/div>

\n Phillip Solomon<\/span> Courtesy of Phillip Solomon\/Instagram<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Dear Phillip,
You are going to spend most of your life praying, hoping and wishing to be \u201cjust like everybody else,\u201d but I promise, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. One day, there will come a moment where you are grateful that you are not. Even though it will feel like love is simply \u201cnot on the table\u201d for you, you will embark on a journey of personal discovery and evolution that will force you to experience the most profound love story ever told; the one where you get to love yourself.
Your greatest aspirations in life are to be happy and make the world a better place by inspiring others, and, without giving too much away, you\u2019re going to get your happy ending. Keep appreciating who you were, celebrating who you are and motivating who you\u2019re going to be.<\/p>\n

Big Brother\u2019s Frankie Grande<\/b><\/h2>\n
\n<\/blockquote>\n
\n
\n\t\"\"
\n\t\"\"<\/p>\n