Hi WNVM-ers,
It’s Cheryl here. First, we want to welcome all the new subscribers who found us via Fawnia’s banger of a story about how they make Gary Oldman look so gross in “Slow Horses.” We hope you enjoy our work here exploring and analyzing multiple facets of the Gen X pop culture experience! And to all our subscribers, let me be sappy for a minute and say that we couldn’t do this without your continued support and enthusiasm. Thank you. (From Fawnia — hi! — too.)
Now for this week. I squirrel away little newsy tidbits on my Notes app in case they inspire me for future stories. In August, I did a digest of hot takes related to some random beauty news I’d saved up (Guy Fieri’s lip balm, for example). It was so fun that I decided to do it again with a new batch of beauty news I hope will be of interest to a Gen X audience. Let’s discuss some ridiculous stuff!
And then in other news, a juicy new MTV read, the best musicians of the last 40 years, and Kea-news x 2.
Per usual, you may need to read the entire newsletter in your browser. Occasionally, we use affiliate links on our site and may earn a small commission if you purchase from one of them. And if you’re feeling generous and don’t want menopause gifts, please give us a heart at the bottom of the post.
Has it been a dream of yours for a loved one to give you one (1) single vaginal wipe as a gift? Well, have I got something for you to add to your wish list!
Ulta, the beauty retailer, recently hosted beauty editors at a press event to introduce them to all the holiday gifting sets it would have on offer this season. I wasn’t invited to it this year, but h/t to beauty and fashion writer Lindy Segal, who helpfully posted images on her Instagram stories.
Meet the Meno Pause Pack ($24), and cue my meltdown. This nightmare in a cheap pouch contains the aforementioned wipe, a vaginal probiotic gummy from a Kardashian-founded brand, two wine-themed products (a supplement and eye patches), a “menopause max” liquid collagen drink, and more.
Who would want this? Most importantly, and I know I’m becoming a broken record here, we don’t need all this stuff, especially the supplements. It is a shameless cash grab because our healthcare system does not support women adequately and research about menopause is still woefully lacking. So we are all hoping that some “red wine-inspired tincture” will help us.
While I’m ranting about this, let’s add Pause & Effect to the list, another new menopause-focused skincare range. This one is founded by Kathy Norton, who sold stuff on-air at the QVC-esque ShopHQ for 19 years. She’s reinvented herself as a menopause coach, and says she was inspired by a dream that told her to start a site called The Menopause Store. The line hasn’t launched yet. Just get some InnBeauty Project products instead. (I haven’t tried a single thing I don’t love from InnBeauty’s “extreme” line.)
To round out the trifecta of (low-estrogen) terror, I give you Meno Moms. Tagline: “Midlife isn’t a crisis. It’s a glow-up.” Naomi Watts’ meno-brand Stripes hosted a pop-up in NYC a few weeks ago, and Meno Moms was there with Meno Merch. You can get a hat that says “midlife queen,” a button reading “Menopause made me do it,” and a pouch proclaiming “hormonal.”
I know we’re all pissed off about how no one really prepared us for this life stage and we want to yell about it and reclaim it, but I don’t know if this is the way. Is this the Gen X midlife equivalent of riot grrrl, except cringier and more expensive?
Did you know Cindy Crawford has had a beauty brand since the early aughts? It’s called Meaningful Beauty and has been sold at Ulta and QVC, but I think now it’s just available on its own site. The packaging is sort of utilitarian and not very modern-looking. The over-45 crowd has historically been its prime customer.
Fawnia and I both got a pitch for the brand’s newest products, including body wash, lotion, and a balm stick. The email featured a picture of Crawford — a supermodel, mind you! — lounging in a white bathing suit and with the copy reading, “Go beyond mere moisturizers with luxurious and powerful body formulas that visibly lift and firm your skin — leaving you feeling confident.”
Then, there was a disembodied before-and-after image of some unidentified saggy knees:
I hate a lot of things about my body, but I’ll admit that even I hadn’t thought to be concerned about my knees. But I sure am now! Fawnia has a friend who keeps asking if Botox works on knees and is now paranoid about her own, especially while staring at her kneecaps in the yoga downward dog position.
Related, that Ulta meno-gift also includes a small tube of Womaness: The Works, which is “all-over toning body cream.”
This all feels like a rebranding of the cellulite creams of yore, like Bliss’ terrible “Fatgirl Slim,” which it relaunched as “Fabgirl Firm,” and now seems to have blessedly retired again.
Heavy, heavy sigh.
Out of respect for Fawnia, who loves Jennifer Lopez, I’m going to tread carefully here. The multi-hyphenate launched a beauty brand called J Lo Beauty in 2021. Almost immediately, she got backlash for it, mostly because she was saying frequently in interviews that her skin looks Like That because of olive oil, which is a component in her products.
It just didn’t read as authentic.
J Lo is glam incarnate. She is shiny lip gloss personified. She is bouncy hair encapsulated. She is not the type to be smearing organic olive oil on her face and calling it a day, and THAT IS OK. We love our divas. We want them to use 39 products at once and do secret things with dermatologists. So people didn’t really buy her messaging, and they also didn’t buy her products.
J Lo Beauty languished at Sephora and eventually quietly exited the retailer in mid-2024. Now, over a year later, her brand released a new product and is apparently still fighting for its life. She appeared on her Instagram wearing rose gold-colored hydrogel undereye patches.
One eagle-eyed Allure writer noted she was wearing them over her makeup, an…unconventional way to use them. Are the ingredients penetrating? This is none of my business. J Lo probably does not want to appear online without her makeup, and who can really blame her? The internet would rip her makeup-free 56-year-old face to shreds because people are assholes. (Fawnia tells me she was pretty makeup-free in her 2024 documentary. But there are no comment sections to contend with there.)
But — it also doesn’t help the narrative that maybe she doesn’t actually use these products. It may be time to hang up the beauty entrepreneur hat, Jenny. I will say, this video is very cute, though:
An in-the-weeds aside for the beauty-heads: J Lo Beauty and Crawford’s Meaningful Beauty are both co-owned by Guthy-Renker, the direct selling company founded in 1988. It was famous for its infomercials for brands like Proactiv. It also makes Victoria Principal’s skincare brand. (Remember her??) And its founder, Bill Guthy, is married to another legendary Victoria, Victoria Jackson. This woman coined the term “no makeup makeup” in the ‘80s and sold $1 billion worth of her products via infomercials. And she is back with a new brand, called, fittingly, No Makeup Makeup. And yes, it’s aimed at the over-40 contingent.
Getting signed as the face of a beauty brand can be very lucrative. So I’m happy when I see the over-50s getting some of that bag, because there are way too few of us on billboards.
Recently, Charlotte Tilbury tapped Céline Dion to star in its very sparkly holiday campaign. Now this is good brand/muse synergy. I’m so happy that Dion is looking happy and healthy. (She was diagnosed with neurological disorder Stiff Person Syndrome a few years ago):
In other “pay us” news, Estée Lauder named Nia Long as its first brand ambassador for North America. She’ll be all over different mediums for the brand. This is another super-inspired hire. This woman is STUNNING. Lately, I’ve been having more fun with makeup and trying to figure out how to look glowier. She is a masterclass in it on a recent clip of Jennifer Hudson’s show. (Also she tells an amazing Prince story.)
It would be remiss of me not to mention here that Estée Lauder has recently been hyper-promoting its classic skincare franchise in the brown bottle, Advanced Night Repair. Jenna Lyons has been shilling it, along with Pauliza Porizkova.
The brand also got a lot of negative attention for its egregious product placement on “Nobody Wants This.” Apparently Kristen Bell works with Estée Lauder, which I didn’t realize. (Read Kirbie Johnson for a deeper analysis of the issue.)
I’ve tried this product on and off, but it smells kind of weird and sometimes that’s a deal breaker for me because I’m superficial that way. I’m curious: Do you use this or have you used it or who could convince you to use it?
We love Amy Poehler’s podcast here at WNVM. So I wanted to steal one of the things she does every episode, which is to ask her guests what they’re watching that makes them laugh.
Mine is Clayton Hawkins, a hair stylist and self-described “hair historian.” He will flip through old Sears catalogs and those hair style magazines that used to be in salons, from the ‘80s, ‘90s, and ‘00s. He makes up rapid-fire backstories for all the models. Here is a sample:
Step aerobics instructor with a secret!
Thank you for reading my *thoughts* this week.
We are two Gen X journalists who explore stories and trends defining our generation, celebrate Gen X-ers doing cool things, and analyze all the ‘80s and ‘90s nostalgia in current pop culture, fashion, and beauty. Read more stories like this one here!
As MTV gasps its last breath, there is a new juicy memoir hitting book shelves. An excerpt: “Exotic dancers would be sent over by the music labels. Bands passed through all the time. Lemmy from Motörhead might wander by with a bottle of tequila. We had one receptionist who sold cocaine. Many of the staff found that convenient.” We’re in! (As a companion, I highly recommend reading the 2012 oral history of the channel, I Want My MTV, which I couldn’t put down.) -CW [Vulture]
To celebrate its 40th anniversary, Spin has been sharing its list of the 40 greatest musicians of the last 40 years. They crowned Depeche Mode as number 15, which I would argue is 14 spots too low. The magazine is also teasing out a concert featuring artists from the last four decades. -CW [SpinMag Instagram]
Kea-news! Harper’s Bazaar is doing a series about obsessions, and Keanu is correctly included. “Reeves has also become a kind of folk hero of decency,” writes Stephen Mooallem. Indeed. -CW [Harper’s Bazaar]
During Aziz Ansari’s visit to “Parks & Recreation” co-star and friend Amy Poehler’s podcast, the Good Fortune writer/director/star confirms that Keanu is “the sweetest” and “the best.” Ansari also drops a vivid anecdote about Keanu’s real life John Wick-like habits around the 43 minute mark. -FSH [Good Hang with Amy Poehler]
My new nepo baby obsession: Emma Thompson and Greg Wise’s actor/model daughter, Gaia, who looks just like mom — I mean … -FSH [Gaia Wise/Instagram]
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