We’ve all joked about being on a first-name basis with a celebrity, or personal friends with a high-profile figure. But what happens when it stops being a joke and fans begin to form what they view as a serious bond with a celebrity they’ve never met?
Parasocial relationships are a dangerous and slippery slope. A parasocial relationship is when a fan or follower has strong, one-sided feelings for a prominent figure with whom they have no contact with. Although it might provide comfort to someone who’s feeling lonely, I honestly think those who engage in a parasocial relationship with a famous individual need a wake-up call: you do not know this person.
Celebrities and public figures often have an entire team dedicated to crafting a perfect public image. Every aspect of their persona is purposefully cultivated to be shown to their fans. We don’t know what they’re really like or if they really use the products or services they endorse. A celebrity’s presence is a persona, not their raw personality. Even famous people whose whole shtick is being down-to-earth and humble have lives that aren’t shown to the public.
The dangers of parasocial relationships become even more apparent with social media platforms. Celebrities and influencers use apps like TikTok to share a more personal and authentic view of themselves with their followers. While entertaining, this kind of unfiltered and unrestricted content can give fans a false sense of familiarity. Additionally, drama channels and accounts report on influencers’ personal lives, often asking invasive and inappropriate questions. It’s important to take what influencers say with a grain of salt – just because they film and post a “what I eat in a day” vlog doesn’t mean that’s actually all they ate. The obsession to be as perfect as possible is unhealthy and, unfortunately, many celebrities and influencers spread that obsession to their fans. It can be detrimental to a person’s health to constantly worry about how they’re being perceived.
I’m not saying every celebrity is secretly evil – although that opens up a whole other can of worms. I’m urging us “regular” people not to get so attached to these “ideal” figures. You can see the negative effects of parasocial relationships by looking at die-hard fans, specifically Taylor Swift fanatics, the Swifties.
Swifties are notorious for being quick to defend Taylor’s every move, even going so far as to send death threats to her dissenters and critics. There is no rational explanation for behaving that way. Yes, she’s released some good music, but she’s also exhibited some pretty selfish behavior. Swift has been accused of releasing re-recordings of her music just in time to prevent other artists from topping the charts and unnecessarily traveling by plane, emitting loads of carbon emissions and attempting to stifle the individual who published that flight and carbon emission information by threatening to sue him, according to this BBC article.
One track on Swift’s latest album, “Actually Romantic,” not only shares a similar intro to The Pixies’ “Where Is My Mind,” but also displays a devastating misunderstanding of Charli XCX’s “Sympathy Is A Knife,” in which Charli details her insecurities surrounding Taylor being such a successful artist. In “Actually Romantic,” Taylor’s fanbase has resorted to blatantly calling Charli a cokehead and alluding to Charli having a romantic interest in Taylor – it’s oddly reminiscent of Regina George’s comment about Janis in “Mean Girls:” “Why are you so obsessed with me?” I encourage those ready to go to bat for their favorite celebrity to remind themselves to worry about their own life before stressing over someone else’s.
Swifties continue to argue with others on the internet, insisting that Swift’s intentions are pure. How do you know what she meant? Unless you heard from the pop singer herself, I beg of you: are you speaking as your own person, or on behalf of a celebrity? You can be a fan of someone and still question their intent and dislike parts of their discography. You’re not required to be a die-hard, a no-matter-what, blind follower.
I’m not sure which celebrities and influencers are genuine with their fanbase, but it goes to show that we do not truly know celebrities. They all have skeletons in their closet; the personality they show to the world is most likely not completely accurate to how they act at home.
It’s concerning to see how many people become so consumed by their admiration for a celebrity that they’re so dedicated to defending that celebrity’s every move. The figure you’re looking up to and wanting to bond with was specifically curated for public consumption. Building a relationship with someone you know in person, in real life, face-to-face, is infinitely healthier and better for your social development. Please, stay grounded. In the simplest of terms, touch grass.
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