Eveline O’Neal turned 87 on Sunday, March 22. She expected Saturday, March 21 — the day for the big celebration — would be a family day with people coming and going. Lots of food. Hugs and stories.
She said she couldn’t estimate how many guests would be there. She would be ready for all the love and well wishes. It could easily be houseful of people. Children, grandchildren and 58 foster children.
Yes, 58 foster children. She keeps a list of the children sitting on her kitchen table — just to help keep track. She started this mission of love in 1979 and her last foster was in 2015.
Many of the foster children are in the area. She treasures them. They call her Big Mama or Grandma.
Eveline sat in her southwest side kitchen recently recounting her life and the children. She helped them through good and bad times.
“The best part of it all is that all of them returned to their families,” she said. “A mother got her life together, started working again and the children went home. Other times, it was a grandparent, uncle or aunt who took them back. I told family members that they always had to be involved with the children.”
She couldn’t say anything specific about situations and working with the Department of Child Services.
“The important part was we gave them love. And stability,” she said. “We never saw color. We were only here to help the children. We never had drama in this house.”
Jenny Lesher is one of the mothers. She had a set of twins, Montell and Maurell, and a little brother, Myron.
“Eveline took them when they were 18 months old,” Jenny said. “Myron was a month old. She never treated any child differently. She never judged them. She supported me emotionally.”
Eventually, Eveline adopted Jenny’s three sons.
“The boys had two mothers — me and Eveline,” Jenny said. “She gave them a strong upbringing, a good start.”
The two mothers worked together to get justice for Montell, who was shot and killed in September 2021. He was 24. “She helped me to handle the grief of losing a child,” Jenny said. “She has a heart of gold.”
Eveline was originally from Natchez, Mississippi. She married Julius O’Neal Jr. in 1955 and came to South Bend a year later. They had two companies, trucking and excavation. Eveline had a daycare. They had five children, Julius III, Darnell, Brenda, Janice and Andrea.
Julius Jr. died in 1998. Julius III died in 2015.
Eveline said her four living children have been foster parents for a number of years.
“The apples didn’t fall from the tree,” she said. “We are a close-knit family. The fosters were added to our family.”
Made it complete.
How did this all start?
“My cousin was doing foster care and she suggested I try it,” Eveline said. “She said I was already a good parent. I filled out the forms and got licensed. That was 1979.”
The calls would come in the middle of the night or anytime. “My husband said yes to the call with the twins, Montell and Maurell. They were little and so cute,” she said, showing a photo of the boys from back then.
“My husband said the twins would be good for me and I wouldn’t be alone,” she said. Eveline believes her husband had a notion that the children would help her after his death. They did.
She said the foster children stayed from a few months to several years.
“Once in a while, a grown foster will stop by,” she said. “I always have extra cereal and milk. The foster will say nothing has changed in all these years.”
It is comforting to them to know things don’t need to change.
Eveline said she tells people to step up and help children if a foster situation happens to come. “You never know about what they are going through, if there is a bad marriage. People just don’t know. But you don’t want to fail the children.”
Jenny said there were always children there. No matter what, the house was never chaotic. “They were all well-behaved and followed the rules.”
Eveline lives with Myron, and a granddaughter, Shanda O’Neal. Son Darnell comes by for a cup of coffee every day and they chat about the little and big things in life.
Looking back, what would you change?
“Nothing,” she said. “I wouldn’t change a thing. It was a blessing to have those children in my life.”
Now for that birthday. Her expectations for the party included lots of family, a cake and “big-headed hundreds.” That means the $100 bill with a big image of Benjamin Franklin.
“They ask me what I want, and that’s it — just the money.”
She had a big laugh about the potential gifts.
Contact Kathy at [email protected].
‘ The preceding article may include information circulated by third parties ’
‘ Some details of this article were extracted from the following source www.southbendtribune.com ’
