Influencer Becca Murray is not looking back despite facing backlash over her decision to set up a divorce registry following her split from her partner of nearly 13 years.
Murray, who received criticism after she referred to her separation as a divorce, explained that the term seemed to fit the situation because “we don’t have good language for unmarried partners in this country.”
“Divorce is, by definition, separation or dissociation from someone else, and after almost 13 years together, divorce is the best way to describe the severity of our split,” Murray told Today in an interview published on Sunday, August 10. “There are all manner of divorces — varying in duration, shared assets, family size, and so much more — and what I choose to call the end of my relationship does not impact anyone else’s.”
Murray — who has more than 450,000 followers on TikTok, where she posts lifestyle content — speculated that the criticism from trolls “seems to be coming from a place of hurt.”
“Folks feel unsupported themselves, and lash out at someone who is receiving the support they wish they had,” she said. “I understand it from that angle, and I think there is a much larger conversation to be had about how we show up for single people and people experiencing large transitions in their lives.”
Murray lived with her ex for nine years and explained that she lost some of her items in the aftermath of the separation. She came up with the idea to create a divorce registry as she navigated the “hardest year” of her life.
“Our lives were entirely intertwined,” she explained. “On top of dealing with the emotional toll and the doubling of my living expenses, I needed to buy everything from a couch to a can opener. Every day, I’d discover something else that was missing: the blender; the drill; all the lamps and more.”
She continued, “A lot of the things I lost were ‘forever’ pieces, and I did not want to replace them with temporary or filler items. I would rather go without a thing — even something I love and miss and use frequently — than buy something with the intention of replacing it down the line.”
Even with the backlash, Murray told the outlet that she’s pleased to have welcomed the help from and support of her followers.
“I’m not great at accepting help — let alone asking for it — and allowing my community to show up for me in this way has been incredibly heartening,” she said.
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