Who is Roasting Kevin Hart? Live updates from Roast of Kevin Hart

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The last time, it drew more than 2 million viewers in the first night.

This one has the chance to be even bigger.

Although expect a lot of small jokes.

Tonight is the Roast of Kevin Hart, Netflix’s second attempt at a roast of a celebirty. The first one was a touchdown when the Netflix Roast of Tim Brady went viral, with clips still being shared on social media two years later.

Tonight, we get The Roast of Kevin Hart. We’ll watch along with you, announce the guests, rate them and pretty much share what we’re allowed. Remember, we’re a family website, and this can get a little Rated R. Or even worse.

The Tom Brady roast was as brutal as it was hilarious, and there’s no reason to think tonight’s show won’t be as good, if not better.

We’ll do it live when they go live, and we’ll take you to the final burn, as Philly’s favorite son gets roasted by his friends and peers.

Now, cards on the table, this is my first time doing this. I’m a pro wrestling and NFL guy. To quote Woody Harrelson, this isn’t my spot, I’ll be lucky to hit one out of five. I gotta be honest. But I’m a Philly guy, Kevin Hart is a Philly guy, the host thinks he’s a Philly guy, so maybe we can have some fun tonight.

Roast of Kevin Hart begins

It’s time. The Roast of Kevin Hart opens Shane Gillis being called out. They already mentioned Philly. So expect this to be a Philly lovefest from these two. I won’t mind it, hope you won’t too. Gillis makes some quick jokes, getting cheered for being a “white host.” Then he calls out the Roots, more Philly flavor. So far so good. He welcomes us to the roast, and like most good events, we get welcomed by our Usher. Then out comes Kevin Hart. Usher, after singing, shows Hart to his throne, then sings quite the song to Mr. Hart. Lots of height references. Hart seems insulted. He’s cutting a promo on Usher. Usher is having a great time. Hart probably is, but he’s gotta be a little nervous. Usually if you say that to your Usher, you’ll get thrown out. But Hart gets away with it.

Kevin Hart sets the tone

Hart riles the crowd up by asking them if they want to have fun. The fans love him. He started ripping Tom Brady for making bad faces during his show. The Roots agreed Tom Brady wasn’t a good sport. And out comes Tom Brady. He snuck right up behind him. And now Kevin turns around. Brady asks in colorful languge for Hart to shut up. He hands Hart a Knicks jersey, which has to sting after today’s sweep. He then calls Hart a Hobit. Brady says he has a few words before he goes to his affairs in Las Vegas, something Hart was accused of. Ouch. Time to get comfortable being uncomfortable! Brady talks about his 23 seasons in the NFL but never saw anyone fumble like Hart. Brady won seven Super Bowls, while Kevin has been in two Ride Along movies. Brady won 5 Super Bowl MVPS, while Hart was the third most popular guy in Jumanji.

He picks on the cast. He said “how did they get there, I thought they shut down Spirit Airlines.” Draymond Green is on the show. Brady said he’s here for now, but will probably get thrown out. He said “we’re not roasting Steve Kerr.” Then he said we have real Eagles fans. He said Hart is a guy who shows up when the team is good. He calls them cowboy fans. Then calls the host Shane Gillis the real “Philly Special.” Then Brady hits on Hart’s wife.

Shane Gillis returns

Gillis starts the show by saying he’s taking a paycheck while pretending to have fun. He then turns his attention to Chelsea Handler, in a joke we can’t tell. And another one. Then Big Jay Oakerson. More jokes we can’t tell. Then Tony Hinchcliffe. You might have to watch this, we can’t say most of this stuff. He said Hinchcliffe goes to Trump rallies to dance to the Village People. He makes some crazy jokes about Sheryl Underwood. Pete Davidson is on the roast. He said Pete had his tattoos removed, so now you have to talk to him to find out he’s an idiot. Draymond Green is next, where he clowns on his name. He mentions the Golden State Warriors, and he makes a pretty tasteless joke. He says Kevin has a 44 inch vertical leap, which he knows because he can kiss his wife on the lips. He makes some height jokes. He said every Kevin Hart movie, you see where it’s staying. He mocks Kevin for being a nice guy, which is funny. He made a joke about Kevin performing for the Saudi government. Shane said he didn’t do it to honor the brave firefighters who lost their lives that day. “Right Pete?” Pete’s dad died in the attacks. But he jokes about it. These roasts are horrible, but the people are laughing, so I guess we can too. Gillis makes another tasteless joke that the fans love. If you don’t mind offensive jokes, I can’t do this justice, you have to watch it.

Jeffrey Ross is up

The most famous name in roasting is up next. He points out John Stamos and Usher, then turns attention to Kevin. He said the world fell in love with Kevin when Michael Jackson dangled him over the balcony. Called him Eddie Smurfy and said it’s not a mic drop when you drop it from two feet. He said we couldn’t get Eddie Murphy, but they got Donky from Shrek, Sheryl Underwood. He said in honor of his dad, Pete Davidson only dates ‘9s’ and ’11s.’ He said Stef Curry couldn’t be here, but he did carry Draymond Green here. He said he’s been ejected more times than a Kevin Hart DVD. He said his dad used crack cocaine, so depending on “The Rock” runs in the family. He said stop doing arms and leg day and start doing script day. He said Kevin flying private is a waste of leg room. He said Prince was also short, but nobody mentioned it because Prince was great.

Wow, Jeffrey Ross said Hart said he looked sicker and sicker last roast, which encouraged Ross to get a scan, and he had stage 3 cancer. But now he’s OK. That’s incredible.

Na’im Lynn up next

He said people might not know him because his show is on BET. He said Tom Brady has seven Super Bowls. Kevin Hart has a Kid’s Choice Award. He said the only thing him and Brady have one thing in common, they love their job more than their wives. Ouch. This guy is good, and not too blue. He’s funny. He questions why is Draymond Green here. Then makes a few jokes on his name.

6 minutes Kevin Hart you’re on

Netflix countdown says we were six minutes away from showtime. So get your stream on, get situation and be ready to laugh for a few hours this Mother’s Day. And Happy Mother’s Day to everyone following along.